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Post by Captain T'Pang on Feb 11, 2013 17:51:27 GMT -5
Date: Saturday, February 11, 2417 Time: 0132 hours Personal Log - Billie Jo Spencer
So my first space side tour with the Sentinel was cut short and the Sentinel is back at Starbase 220. The crew spent the entire day waiting around as the fleet councelor interviewed the crew. It was into the evening before Doctor Hathaway got around to interviewing the senior staff. When I was called in she asked me a bunch of questions about the symptoms of PTSD. After all that antcipation this was rather disappointing. I mean really I could have saved her the time she could have justed asked me straight away if I thought I was experiencing PTSD. I think I know enough about psychology to recognize the symptoms.
[Billie Jo laughs]
They say doctors make the worst patients..I don't know where they get that from.
[laughs a little more]
But it wasn't a complete waste, I did get some time to mingle with some of the crew. Most notably I met one of our new crew, Braynoc Har’kara. Bray is a Ta’be, a race from a newly minted Federation member world in the Delta Volanis cluster. His people are interesting, to say the least. We spent some time discussing the cultrual differences between humans and the Ta’be. Bray has a tendency to take what you say literally, which I predict may make for some humorous moments in the future.
Also got a chance to speak without Chief Engineer, Shantal. It wasn't quite what I expected. I suppose given the fact she is a liberated Borg I had certain presuppositions about what her personality would be like. I imagined someone more emotionless and machine like, you know all...
[in a mock computer voice]
"Affirmative." "Does not Compute."
[back to normal voice]
I suppose that is wrong I guess to prejudge people based on how they look. But, its hard not to sometimes. Anyway she defied my expectation, she actually had a personality, a rather down home folksie sort of personality, you know like any other person.
[shrugs]
Still I doubt I will be hanging out in engineering any time soon. For one all that technology makes me nervous and those engineers always stare at "outsiders" when they come into engineering like they think you are going to try and steal something.
At any rate it was the most restful duty shift I have ever had since joining Starfleet and to be honest probably one of the longest and most boring. Of course after the way the last mission went I am afraid to hope for being released for duty any time soon. But, non-the-less I am hopeful we will get back out into space soon.
Oh well I am going to bed its late, computer end log...
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Post by Lt Cmdr Billie Jo Spencer MD on May 19, 2013 19:46:20 GMT -5
Personal Log: Bille Jo Spencer - Stardate 90790.30
We have been given some extra time off and after recent events I really need it. As a doctor I'm used to blood and gore, but people's heads exploding is traumatic under any circumstances. They just can not train you to be ready for that sort of thing.
I am taking some time to catch up on my corespondence. I haven't sent a message to my brother Larry in ages. He probably thinks I'm dead.
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Post by Lt Cmdr Billie Jo Spencer MD on Jun 24, 2013 16:16:16 GMT -5
Personal Log: Bille Jo Spencer - Stardate 90880.31
I've always been somewhat pig headed, and invariably it leads me into trouble. This time is no different. I don't know where to begin...Maybe at the beginning. Having heard of the offical report, submitted to Starfllet command regarding the incident at the colony in HC-19, I decided to read it. I was expecting a scathing condemnation over what at best was a depraved indifference and at worst cold blooded murder. In an attempt to cover up what was likely an illegal weapons research facility hidden on the colony these people, Section 31 they are calling themselves, detonated an explosive device and released a powerful entity that was apparently imprisoned there. This inevitably led to the deaths of some nine thousand innocent people.
The report was not what I expected, and that is putting it mildly. The report mentioned nothing regarding the hidden facility on the planet. While we had no direct evidence it was a weapons research facility. The fact that they had access to banned subspace weapons was a clear indication they were up to no good. But, these facts were excluded from the report. The presence of the other Federation vessel and the Romulan warbird were also not mentioned. The report attributed the death to a massive industrian accident and stated the Sentinel only showed up at the end of the disaster and thus was apparently a witness to nothing of value in the incident. In other words the report was a complete lie. To make matters worse none of the Sentinels sensor logs nor its personnel reports were included with the report. It turns out that none of these logs are accessible anymore, they are sealed by some unknown high level Starfleet officer. I can only imagine that was a temporary measure until their people could get access to delete the files peramanantly. This was more than I could stand, I had to take some sort of action.
I managed to schedual an appointment with and assistant Federation attorney general on Starbase 234. I not real proud of the fact that I was intending to go over Captain Dalun's head in the matter, it would have at best made her look incompetant and at worst perhap complicant in the matter. But after she promised me she wouldn't let the matter go, yet was apparently not prepared to act even after this new report I...I lost confidence in her and was uncertain if she could be trusted any more. So I was stepping onto the turbolift, on my way to the transporter room to beam down to the embassy to check out a shuttle to head to my meeting, when I met Harvey. He said he was an embassy repair tech, but I have doubts about that story. He had an incredible amount of information on me and my recent activities, and he had access to security override codes for the the turbolift at least. It seemed obvious he was not who he claimed to be.
Harvey infomred me that my investigation had generated a response from the Section 31 people and that they knew of my appointement and that I never would have made it that far. He also informed me that there were people in Starfleet command that could be trusted and they wanted the same thing I did. He also made it clear that the crew of the Sentinel, and Captain Dalun specifically, had been the subject of a massive lie and thus were acting on bad information. He gave me a Romulan type data crystal and told me that the captain needed to see it. This is of course where things started to get serious.
Before I even got off the lift Lieutenant Commander Erys Murai came showed up and held me at gun point. Her justification was that I had attempted to access classified documents. She was refering to the files on the HC-19 incident. I was shocked an amazed that she was behaving as if the whole thing was business as usual and that my actions were the ones that were criminal. She took me into the captain's ready room and despite my attempt to reach her she insisted that this was all a matter that should be left alone and even more jaw dropping she was attempting to rationalize, even justify the action of these Section 31 people. It was not something I could believe was coming out of the mouth of a Starfleet officer. Even if the deaths were unintended, that doesn't make them any less criminal. It occured to me that Erys may very well be loyal to the wrong people. Of course it may be the case she is simply attempting to shield us all from the threat she knows these people represent. Either way she is misguided if she believe these people have any intention of allowing any of us to live at this point. Our very existence is a threat to these people now.
I managed to get the data crystal to Captain Dalun, but to be honest I was a bit confused when she decide to not look at it and send it to Captain Talia on the Adagio. I did however choose to trust her judgement in the matter and returned to sickbay. It was at this time that the ship was attacked by an unknown cloaked ship. Apparently they were attempting to destroy the ship and make it look like an accident. The crew managed to stop the attack, but a message from Harvey to me, indicated that forces were set in motion and that our new enemies would not stop until we were dead. Our only option had now become to use the data on that crystal to take the fight to them. Either they are going down are we are at this point. I relayed this data to the captain and she took a look at the data. It turns ouot that we are not the only Starfleet ship involved in this now. Apparently the Adagio has launched its own investigation into the incident. Captain Dalun decided our best option was to join forces with them and join the investigation.
I can't help but fear that this corruption may be too much for us and that the inevitable result is the deaths of us all. I also can't help but realize that we would not be in this position if I had not foolishly thought I was even remotely cabale of looking into this matter on my own. While it is possible that the Adagio looking into things spurred this response from the bad guys, it is also highly likely that it was my bumbling about that triggered this response. This means that in all probability if this ship and its crew encounter some grim fate out there, it is likely my fault. Well at least I won't have to live with the guilt. I can't help but feel a profound sense of sadness, if we die the terrible secrets die with us. Worse than that I so want to contact my family and tell them good bye, but for security reasons I can't. Hell, I don't even know if its safe to make this log. But I am doing it anyway, not that it matters if we die this log will be lost anyway.
Computer End Log...
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Post by Lt Cmdr Billie Jo Spencer MD on Aug 16, 2013 16:19:14 GMT -5
Personal Log: Billie Jo Spencer Stardate: 91013.52
This ship is a madhouse, an asylum run by the inmates. When you can't even depend on senior staff members to follow the rules why should any of the crew do so? Things decend into chaos. Somehow Captain Dalun managed to keep a lid on the insanity, by sheer force of will I suspect. Asada is a good officer, but I am beginning to doubt he can do it. I don't don't know maybe in time, but will this crew stay together long enough to give him that sort of time. I really wish Captain Dalun was here. She really deserves the time off with her new family, and the happiness. So its would be rather cruel to force her back here just to deal with our problems. I considered contacting her for some advice on this, but I decided not to. I didn't want to distress her with this business.
On a positive note, the viral outbreak at the colony in the Carraya Star System has been taken care of with zero loss of life. I would love to claim credit for this little miricle but I can't. If it were up to me the death toll would have been staggering. Somehow Centurion Khiarra managed to out Romulan the Tal Shiar and obtain all their secret files on the virus and their operations in this system. The data incuded a cure, we quickly synthesized enough for the colony. Now that we have the cure it is unlikely the Tal Shiar will use this particualr virus on another world but if they do, I forwarded the data to Starfleet Medical so we will be ready.
I was unhappy that Starfleet insisted on pressing charges on Centurion Tarva and Ensign Jenny Sommers , I was certain that after hearing about their selfless acts that certainly the charges would have been dismissed. While I certainly understand Commander Murai's moral dilema over being ordered to arrest the pair. I find her untter lack of judgment most distressing, she is the ship's XO (or was, it remains unclear what effect her actions will have on her career.) She apparently felt that fighting a hopeless cause was worth throwing her career away for and worth endangering the lives of others, including the the very two she was supposedly trying to save. It makes no sense to me. While many of us were unhappy with the situation, we realize that there are more effective means to handle the situation, ways that don't involve destroying our careers or endangering lives.
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Post by Lt Cmdr Billie Jo Spencer MD on Dec 24, 2013 11:21:03 GMT -5
Personal Log: Billie Jo Spencer Stardate: 91337.20
Apparently these things, these shadow creatures, have gotten inside my head somehow. I have to admit I'm scared, really scared. When I realized it all wasn't just my imagination as I had been trying to fool myself into believing, I nearly had a panic attack. I mean if they can get all up inside your head where can you go to get away from them? I would seem that Xemion and Sebetharen have had their own encounters with the bastards. If its keeping them up at night they haven't reported it.
I have enlisted help from Xemion in trying to find some way of battling these creatures. Of the entire crew he is likely the only one with the skills and abilities necessary to have any chance of effectively dealing with these monsters. Not to be overly dramatic, but he might be my only hope.
So far there is no explanation as to who these aliens are or why it is that they seem to have taken an interest in me, Xemion, and Sebetharen. I suppose I am the hardest to explain, being human and lacking any sort of ESP abilities, I seem to be the odd man out and thus their interest in me is hardest to explain. I could just be a matter of being in the wrong place at the wrong time.
The most disturbing is that this all may be part of some much larger conspiracy. While speaking to Xemion about it he informed me that there may be some connection with his people. He spoke about some encrypted message from his people. While he didn't exactly explain why he thought so, he seemed to think there was some possible connection between his people and these shadow creatures. I can't help but get the feeling there is something he isn't sharing.
But, to be honest none of that matters to me, all I want to do is get these aliens out of my head.
OOC: Help me, Obi-Xem Kenobi; you're my only hope.
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Post by Lt Cmdr Billie Jo Spencer MD on Jan 26, 2014 7:31:48 GMT -5
Personal Log: Billie Jo Spencer, MD. Stardate: 91422.42
Dupe, mark, chump, pigeon. That is apparently what I am. Am I really that blindly naive? It turns out our visting Romulan scientist was an enemy agent. Xemion insists she was being mind controlled by some sort of telepathic means. While that might help T'Lena's case, it does raise the question: Exactly when was she taken control of? Did she come on board that way? Was it all a ruse? Did she get me to like her and trust her so she could use me to betray the Sentinel and its crew? I won't be getting answers to any of these questions any time soon, security isn't allowing anyone to speak to her.
The ship is now headed back to Starbase 234 so Starfleet can investigate the matter. I can't help but think the fallout from this is going to be massive. I am not really looking forward to any of this, but at least I might get some answers. At this point my head is still spinning. I never saw any of this coming and still am uncertain what happened and why?
With respects to my research regarding the strange shadow aliens, that seems to be on hold, assuming they were real and not part of this con job. It may not matter since we are headed away from the sphere.
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Post by Lt Cmdr Billie Jo Spencer MD on Jul 28, 2014 17:38:08 GMT -5
----Deleted Entry----
Billie Jo plops down in the seat in front of the computer terminal in her quarters. Taking the time before her room mate gets off duty to contemplate a rather candid log entry. She sets her drink, a glass of scotch from her private stash in her drawer, onto the table top.
"Computer begin recording log entry." She orders, and the computer responds that is has begun recording.
"I feel like I'm going crazy. I supose if I can even ask the question that there has to be some semblence of rationality left in me somewhere. Right?"
[there is an extended period of silence as if she is waiting for an answer. Billie Jo takes a long sip from her drink and continues.]
"I don't know who to trust any more. I can point to several members of the Sentinel crew that I can point to more than one good reason to mistrust, even doubt their loyalties. It is my sincere hope that I am wrong about it all, and I am just being paranoid. "
*a long sigh, and another sip from her drink.*
"First their was Erys. As if her rumored ties to rogue elements within Starfleet intelligence wouldn't be cause enough to doubt her loyalties. You have her penchant for violence and over reaction. While her stated purpose was to protect the crew, I felt she viewed us all more as potential suspects. The there was the use of excessive force against Lieutenant Xethrill. While, obviously a clear violation of Starfleet use of force policy, I am not certain any more how unjustified it might have been. I don't think she ever trusted Xethrill from the day he stepped on board the ship. Despite my misgivings about her as an officer, its hard to deny her instincts as a security officer and soldier. Anyway none of this really matters any more, she has transferred off the ship and is no longer an issue.
I confronted Lieutenant Xethrill in the lab the other day. I denied him access to the data and samples from the body of the entity known as Joshua. My primary concern was possible evidence tampering. The clues we have uncovered pointing to a link to some very unsavory telepathic entities, including the Mister Joshua we recently encountered cast suspicion on the Xethrillians. Are they or are they not a threat to the Federation?
Xemion, isn't necessarily linked to any of this, but his convenient presence is starting to raise some questions. For example, he claims to have arrived here "accidentally", yet it is becoming apparent that the Xenthrillian presence in this part of the galaxy goes back much further. I am uncertain how that information could be unknown to him. it calls into question his story about how he arrived in Federation space and raises the question: why is he really here? I just suspect he is not telling us everything he knows.
Related to that, it is impossible to tell how much influence Xemion has over the first officer. The two have become very close. It can't be ruled out that Xemion is using his telepathic abilities to influence him or even control him.
While I trust the captain, I worry she may not be up to the task. I am concerned about possible mental or emotional issues that may comprosmise her ability to lead.
Speaking of possible mental or emotional issues, the is our chief engineer. As a former Borg drone it is hard to gauge what exactly "normal" behavior would be for her. She has always seemed aloof and in need of very little if any interaction with the rest of the crew and quite recently I found out she had little need for my skills as a physician. But, recent events on the alien ship, the Kovada, where she seemed all to ready to use physical violence against me has profoundly shaped my perceptions of her. It seem quite possible she possible views non-cybernetically enhanced beings with some level of contempt or resentment, or perhaps it is just me. Either way I try to give her as wide a berth as possible these days."
*leans back in the chair and tips back the glass, gulping down the remainder of the liquid inside. sits there in silence for several minutes.*
"To hell with it, computer delete this log entry."
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Post by Lt Cmdr Billie Jo Spencer MD on Aug 1, 2014 23:23:30 GMT -5
Billie Jo takes a seat at the computer terminal. As she does she sets her drink down on the desk top. The implacable expression on her face not quite indicating the depth of the anger boiling inside. She takes a long sip from the drink.
"Computer begin recording personal log entry." she snapped.
"Beginning log entry now." The computer responded, indifferent to her tone.
"What does he think this is a game?" Spencer paused as if reconsidering her words, "I had a confrontation with Lieutenant Xethrill regarding access to the autopsy samples and data. Which based on the fact that it was a medical matter should have afforded me the authority to decide who was going to be working on the project. That alone should have been enough. However, for some reason he seems to be under the impression his skills were essential to the investigation and that denying his assess might lead to "major mistakes" as he put it. Which is just an encoded way of telling me he thinks me incompetent. A theme he repeated a few more time before he finally relented and left the medical deck. As it was he had to be escorted from the medical lab by security.
It all seems rather rich coming from a guy who merely dabbles in genetics in his spare time. I don't question his expertise in the physical sciences, but I am unaware of any special qualification in medicine or life sciences that would make him essential to the investigation. I wasn't exactly in the mood to sit down and explain this to him, especially considering his attitude. So I didn't. I was thankful when the security team showed up, I am not certain that things would not have escalated out of control.
Speaking of security teams, it would seem that Starfleet security has taken something of an interest in the investigation. While they have not taken over the investigation at this point and seem content to let us do the leg work on it. They, " Billie Jo pause, "No, not they. Morgan seems to be keeping close tabs on the investigation and quite probably me as well. I am not sure what this means exactly. I have this feeling he is concern is of a more personal nature. Although I have to admit his help has proven invaluable during the investigation. The convenient bump in my security clearance. The locking out of Xemion from files related to the Joshua case. The well timed security detail. All of that was apparently his doing. All of which really helped salvage an untenable situation.
Speaking of confrontations, I am waiting here in Morgan's apartment for him to return. We will be having a discussion. That should be interesting."
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Post by Lt Cmdr Billie Jo Spencer MD on Nov 12, 2014 21:07:55 GMT -5
Sits in front of the computer console on the desk. Her eyes peer about nervously before returning to the computer screen.
“Computer record log entry, attach current stardate.” She ordered. “Affirmative beginning recording now.” The computer responded promptly.
“Personal Log – Billie Jo Spencer – Stardate 92466.82
I'm not sure what I might have set in motion, but I have to admit I am more than a little worried. It is possible that Doctor Hathaway is just being melodramatic. Although, in all the time I have known her I never got the impression she was prone to such behavior. She stated that 'someone' had red flagged the medical data I had taken from Ensign Denise Daniels. I am not entirely sure at what point this someone had managed to intercept the data. Was it when I sent it to Amanda, or before. Who is watching whom? Are they keeping tabs on me or Doctor Hathaway. Either way I can't help but feel more than a bit paranoid. Hence I am using Morgan's computer to record this. I wouldn't record this, except I was told not to inform anyone else, so I would like some record of these events should anything happen.
I should tell Denise, but I don't want to alarm her unnecessarily, especially considering the stress she seems to be under. After all this could be nothing. --pauses momentarily-- But, I can't help but worry about her. What is she involved in?
There was nothing obviously wrong with her medical scans. Although I did detect some strange anomalies that I was not able to identify. We were discussing recent events on board the Sentinel. In which a group of rather nasty aliens came aboard and created havoc. They were apparently some form of jail keepers for some powerful entity that they referred to as the 'Merchant of Death'. The merchant has apparently at some point possessed Doctor Susan Smythe, the archeologist from an archeological dig in the Azure nebula. It appears as if Denise had. –pauses-- has? Some sort of connection to this merchant creature, or perhaps just some sort of ability to sense his presence. I inquired as to the nature of this sense, she mentioned she had always experienced dreams, well nightmares, and the sensation of hearing music. She called it 'star music'. The oddest thing about it is that, as crazy as it sounds, when the diagnostic computer detected the anomalies I could have swore I heard..--pauses with a sigh.-- music. In the distance, almost unrecognizable, but some sort of music like a choir of voices. Also several minutes later just before Denise left sickbay, I thought I heard it again.
I told her I would help her out and I intend to do so. I'm just concerned that I might be out of my depth on this one.
Computer end recording. ”
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Post by Lt Cmdr Billie Jo Spencer MD on Apr 29, 2015 7:57:12 GMT -5
Billie Jo forced a smile as she stared into the camera. But, her eyes looked haunted with some inner anxiety. She sighed deeply.
“Computer begin log entry.” She ordered.
“Log entry recording in progress.” The computer replied in its characteristic calm emotionless tone.
“Personal Log Billie Jo Spencer, Stardate 92566.51
It has been over five hours since the start of the Iconian invasion. Things are still in a state of complete disarray.” She began, her tone betraying her inner anxiety.
“By all estimations I can think of no rational reason for it, but I remain hopeful that we will make it trough this current crisis. During the battle at starbase 234, I felt the presence of the same entity that aided the Sentinel at the battle at Ardana III. I am not sure what their relationship to the Guardian we met in the Nequencia system, but I suspect them to be of the same species. I find that certain people, well specifically me and Denise Daniels can not only sense these being through their 'song' as Kylia called it. I suspect it is how they refer to a beings life force, but in their case specifically the vibrations literally do sound like music. Thus, it make the term appropriate. Also I get this feeling that music and songs are an important aspect of their culture. I don't know how I would know that, but I just feel it. It is as if who they are just sort of resonates with me.
Just like at Ardana, it was possible to not only communicate with the Guardian, but also forge a link to the being so that it could use its energy to assist the Sentinel and her crew in dealing with the Herald onslaught. I am uncertain what exactly prevents a more direct intervention of their part. So far I have not discussed this with anyone outside of Denise. But, the captain is not blind and I know Donny filed a report concerning happening during the battle of Ardana. There will be questions, it is only a matter of time before people start asking them. I am not sure I have the answers they will be looking for though.
Speaking of answers, so far I have not had any word on Morgan. I hope he is safe.”
Billie Jo looks down at the small wooden box on her desk, then back at the screen. “Liz I thought we had a deal. Please, live up to your end. Please.”
After a short pause, “Computer, end log.”
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Post by Lt Cmdr Billie Jo Spencer MD on Jul 9, 2015 17:53:30 GMT -5
Billie Jo sat at the desk, in the apartment she shared with Morgan on Starbase 220, cradling her coffee cup in her hands. She would periodically lift the cup to her lips and take a sip. She gazed absently at the computer screen searching for the words she wanted to say, the words she felt she needed to express. She sighed deeply and then set her cup down.
“Computer begin log recording.” she ordered. The machine replied without question.
“Personal log, Billie Jo Spencer, Stardate 92742.23. The past few months have been stressful, to say the least. “ She began, then paused. “No, the last few years have been stressful. I was hoping some time away on Risa would help. It didn't. It seems like there is no getting away from these troubles. So I am back at work. I've explained the situation to the captain, as best I can. I would not be surprised if she stops trusting me, I don't even know if I trust myself anymore. Captain Dalun asked if I had been compromised, I had no idea how to respond to that. The truth is I don't know.” Billie Jo stopped. There was a longer pause.
“The truth of the matter is it is not a question of if I have been compromised, it is a matter of how badly. Unidentified people have been messing around in my head and whole chunks of my life have been blocked away. This strange encounter on Risa, with the mysterious Betazoid.” again pauses, “If the captain had any common sense she wouldn't trust me.” Billie Jo stopped speaking long enough to take a sip of her coffee.
“It hadn't really occurred to me how badly I am compromised emotionally, until my last night on Risa. Me and Captain Dalun had encountered members of the crew of the USS Adagio. Initially it was just the ship's executive officer, Xaelie Arnimane, and one of the ship's science officer Solia. The subject of the investigation came up, In fact they both seemed to already have a great deal of knowledge of the situation. Anyway one thing led to another and they offered the resources of the Adagio to help with the investigation. This will prove invaluable, the Sentinel's science facilities are severely lacking and I feel the need for a certain level of secrecy regarding this matter so requesting time at the starbase lab is out of the question, I don't want to have to explain the purpose of the request. Since Xaelie is our own chief engineer Shantal's sister, she is family and can be trusted. With this extended assistance, we should be able to get a lot closer to unraveling the mystery of what happened to Alice Walker. Hopefully, in doing that I can also learn something about what happened to me, since it is becoming apparent that there is some sort of connection there.” Billie Jo again stopped and took a drink of her coffee.
“Speaking of connections, we manage to learn certain facts about Mitch Endel that gave me a much clearer perspective on the man. Earlier Captain Dalun had done some research and learned that Endel had served with a lieutenant Talia (now Captain Talia of the USS Adagio), during the battle of Chimera. The same place I suspect the technology that they used to bring Alice back to life came from. Well later that night Talia showed up and joined our conversation. She met our Endel for the first time since Chimera. The reunion was pretty shocking. It turns out that Endel had in fact died on Chimera. Thus both him and Alice are likely victims of the same research program.
It was made clear that Endel is nowhere near his former self and that whatever brought him back was not able to repair all the damage caused by his death. Talia demanded to know why we had not attempted repair this damage. To be honest I had no adequate answer to that question. I could make excuses, blame the lack of information from his medical record or the general lack of adequate medical facilities on board the Sentinel. But, the truth is I never tried. It wasn't like questions about his fitness for duty had not come up. As the Chief Medical Officer I should have followed up on it. But, I didn't. Given the sort of hell the Sentinel has been through it is amazing that he hasn't been killed...again.” Billie Jo stopped and sipped on her coffee, she frowned as she did the drink was getting quite cold. She set it down and continued. “It is my duty to look after the health and safety of the crew and I failed at that. It is hard to look at myself in the mirror sometimes. I had no idea how compromised I really was. Whoever it is behind all this, they have been leading me around by the nose for some time now. I can't help but think that may getting certain people killed, like Endel, might have been the point all along. After all him and Alice do represent evidence of whatever secret project these people have going on. Or, maybe there is some other nefarious purpose at play. Either way I am tired of being toyed with. I think it is time to take the fight to these bastards.”
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Post by Lt Cmdr Billie Jo Spencer MD on Jul 13, 2015 16:39:20 GMT -5
Personal Log, Billie Jo Spencer, Stardate 92762.23.
Jonathan isn't stupid. He knows I am not telling him everything. I keep telling myself its for his own good. After all, look at his reaction to what I have told him so far. I can only imagine the reaction to everything I haven't said. But, in the end I suspect that compartmentalizing this information is a much for my protection as anyone's.
This new crew member Vareiya, is a brand new mystery. After a rather lengthy conversation it became apparent that the only real connection between her and the Sentinel crew was a rather unwise over-sharing of information on the part of our own mister Cameron. In a conversation on Risa, fueled by frustration and alcohol, Jon shared some of the details regarding Alice Walkers situation. It was suggested that perhaps the mysterious transfer was motivated by what she learned in that conversation.
I'm not buying that however. I suspect the motives are much deeper. I don't necessarily believe that Vareiya is consciously aware of any of these machinations. I get the impression she is just as perplexed by this whole thing as the rest of us. But, I have to say that the fact that we now have a telepath on board the ship poses a whole new set of issues for me personally. Oh sure we had Commander Asada, but his telepathic abilities are far less developed and his level of self absorption meant he was far less interested in poking around in other peoples business. With Vareiya I suspect having her on the Sentinel, with its secrets, is a lot like letting the fox loose in the hen house. Don't get me wrong I like her, she is pleasant to talk to and to be honest I rather envy her free and uninhibited personality. But, none of that changes the fact that her mere presence complicates things. Maybe that is the point.
One last note, I speak about this matter with other members of the crew in the third person. What they did to Alice. Yet I have no idea what my relationship is with them. I have no idea what my involvement is with them. They know and I need to know what they know. I am considering a more direct approach. It seems obvious they don't want me dead. But, the fact that I have no idea what they do want frightens me. If I thought that turning myself over would stop them from threatening the rest of the crew I would do now. But, I know enough to realize that would not change things, this thing is much bigger than me. But, the thought has occurred to me to just show up on their doorstep and ask them what I want to know. Of course the only doorstep I know about is the Anubis. Is that really the right door to go knocking at?
Computer end log.
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Post by Lt Cmdr Billie Jo Spencer MD on Jul 19, 2015 2:36:01 GMT -5
Personal Log, Billie Jo Spencer, Stardate 92776.97
I'm so bored. Since I have returned to Starbase 220 there has not been much to do. It wasn't like it was right after the battle at New Romulus, when the whole place was in chaos. With the casualties that kept flowing in we were literally working around the clock. There was nothing else except work, with breaks for meals and sleep if you were lucky and there was a break in the action. But, then things slowed down, they even started rotating people out for leave. Finally I headed off to Risa.
Now that I am back though I have been feeling pretty useless. Other than working relief shifts in the medical section and getting Sentinel's sick bay ready for the next mission I have mostly just been tying to find ways to pass the time. A lot of the entertainment systems had to be taken offline in order to free up resources for the extra capacity the station is handling right now. So there is not a lot to do. Tonight I burned through a bunch of replicator rations to buy some drinks at the lounge and do some dancing. The place was mostly dead. As the night stretched on I thought about leaving.
Commander Xaelie Arnimane wandered in, we spent a couple hours talking. I learned she was quite the musician. I gained a new perspective on her and, through her, I learned about her sister Shantal. I knew they had been part of the Borg collective, as Shantal had as said that before. I was not aware of the circumstances surrounding their being removed from the collective and apparently imprisoned by elements within...Actually she did not specifically state who they were. I assumed Starfleet. But, the story shed some new light on these sisters. Certain aspects of Shantal's personality seem to make more sense now. Mosly I have come to understand we may have more in common that I would have previously thought.
End Log
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Post by Lt Cmdr Billie Jo Spencer MD on Jul 20, 2015 7:18:38 GMT -5
Personal Log, Billie Jo Spencer, Stardate 92779.99
Well last night was certainly interesting. Once again, after spending a shift in the starbase medical center, I headed off to the lounge to waste another boring and lonely evening dancing and drinking alone. Morgan is off doing God know what for the Federation, with Commander Elizabeth Razzor. I'm sure it's important. I'm sure they are off saving the universe. But, all I can think is that by the converse I says I am not important to him. I'm sure it is selfish and immature to think that way, but I do. I can't help it. Plus I worry about him. He is probably safer than I am, but still I worry. Even more now after having talked with Lieutenant Brand.
Brand issued some sort of cryptic warning about Starfleet Intelligence personnel disappearing. He is either crazy or he is actually with Starfleet Intelligence. I have no idea which to be honest. I should look into it. If he is a spy I need to know which side he is working for. He as much as admitted to being a spy and I laid into him pretty hard. I sort of felt bad afterward, except for the fact that I am tired of finding out people around me have been lying to me. The thought did occur to me that it was extremely foolish of me. It isn't like the guy couldn't pretty much break me in two without breaking a sweat. And, do I really know him well enough to say he wouldn't. He did say he was there to protect me. But, as is I can not take that statement at face value with out confirmation. And, speaking of needing to confirm stories. Brand mentioned he had a, shall we say rendezvous, with Sissia on Risa. I need to look into this without looking like I'm looking into that. That should be interesting.
The rest of the evening went well. I hung out with with Commander Asada, Jonathan Cameron, and the new officer Vareiya Oradar. We had a few laughs and more than a few drinks. Swapped war stories. And, by war stories I mean we talked about life, love, family, as well as another topics that came to mind. Vareiya, as it turns out is much more, um, free spirited than I had previously figured. She had her fair share of juicy stories. I think she has taken an interest in Commander Asada. I'm not necessarily saying a romantic interest, well, maybe. But, certainly Tibs is the subject of her curiosity. It may be an intellectual curiosity but, the two may be the same with her. All I can say is this will be interesting. I must monitor this situation, you know for medical research.
It felt a bit awkward when the subject turned to Joshua Cameron. I have had more memories about Joshua. I have no intention of telling Jonathan about this. I don't know what I would tell him any way. I haven't figure out what it all means. I do feel bad keeping him in the dark though. I keep telling myself it is for his own good. But, is it really?
Computer End Log...
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Post by Lt Cmdr Billie Jo Spencer MD on Jul 27, 2015 8:30:50 GMT -5
Personal Log, Billie Jo Spencer, Stardate 92797.75
Well one thing I can say for sure about life as a member of the Sentinel crew, is that things have a way of getting interesting. I got to meet this mysterious fiance that Vareiya keeps going on about. His name is Devin Stadi, and contrary to expectations he is in fact a Starfleet tactical officer and not a historian. Apparently her mother has been lying, but that is another story I think. The guy is quite pleasant to look at, the phrase eye candy comes to mind. So I guess Vareiya has that to look forward to in spite of this marriage to Devin being an arranged one. Given how Vareiya speaks about Devin and the frequency, I find it quite probable there is in fact some real and deep emotion there.
It of course has been noted that both of them winding up assigned to the Sentinel at the same time seems statistically unlikely at best. I can't really speak to that, but given the meddling by outside forces that has been going on, even the tiniest of changes are enough to evoke concern at this point. The transfers could be innocent. Not that I really believe that, but it is possible. But, no matter the circumstances at least they two of them are together. They at least have that.
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